Let Them Get Messy

When I was growing up, I was highly discouraged from getting dirty or wet when I played. I don't ever remember using paint until Kindergarten, and the thought of purposefully jumping in puddles made me shudder.

I don't tell this for the sake of having a pity party. I tell this because it helps me understand why it's sometimes hard for me to let the kids make a mess. I have to consciously let my kids get dirty and wet during play. Whether it be water, dirt, mud, paint or markers, I have to let them. It's the way kids learn best. This I know, even if it wasn't my own experience.

Making a mess is not something that comes naturally to me. It's taking a lot of retraining on my part. I can't tell you the number of times I've had to stop myself from saying: "Don't do that! You'll get wet/messy/etc". The truth is, most kids don't mind getting messy. It's mostly because of disapproving adults that children begin to think that dirty equals bad.

Playgrounds are a prime example. Small puddles of water are at the end of each slide in the morning, and the sandbox is a little muddy. Rosie went down a slide, got her bottom wet, and looked at me questioningly. Instead of the old me, who would have been annoyed and bothered, I said "It's alright, honey. We have extra clothes in the car." She smiled and went on her way, not bothered at all with wet pants.

Buddy was digging in the sandbox, and he was dumping some of the pails that had rain water in them directly onto his shoes. This surely would have bothered me a few years ago. Now? I knew they'd dry in the sun that afternoon. I've had to tell myself over and over that there is nothing wrong with them getting dirty. Change the outfit when they're done playing. Don't dress them in something you wouldn't want to get dirty. Carry extra clothes in the car at all times.

It's pretty simple.

One last step that I still forget sometimes- I have to dress for play, too. When I know we're going to use paint, or be outdoors, I need to wear clothes that I don't care terribly about, so I don't have to be "afraid" of getting dirty, either. I do these things because I don't want my kids to think dirty equals bad. I want them to think that messy equals fun, something I'm learning through them every day.