Handing it Over

I used to be a chronic worrier.

I would get so nervous before doctor and dentist appointments, before get-togethers and parties.

I would also worry about what "could" happen to Steve, to the kids, to other family members, to the house, to our cars, etc.

This summer I have really made a valiant effort to not worry quite so much. I have decided that part of my Faith has to be trusting in God completely: my worrying accomplishes nothing and does not show that I trust Him.

Ever since I put my Faith directly in God, I have felt a weight off of my shoulders. There was one time last month that I couldn't reach Steve, and the kids were with him. My mind started going down the Very Scary List of what might have happened to them and why I couldn't reach them (in those moments my brain seems unable to register the obvious- that he probably just didn't hear the phone or have reception). I then realized what I was doing, and how ridiculous it was. As corny as it may sound, at that moment, I actually envisioned myself handing my worries to God and saying aloud: "I trust you, God. They are in your hands".

I went from an 8 to a 0 on the freak-out scale. I realized how useless my worrying was, and how it couldn't change anything that had happened or was going to happen. I then proceeded to go about my morning. When the phone finally did ring, I was able to answer without sounding too much like a crazed person.

While I have made huge progress with this, I know it's going to take vigilance on my part to not lapse back into my worrywart ways. It's going to take time and effort, as does anything that's worthwhile.