Out with the Old

It seems that 2013 wants to leave a memorable impression on us.

Christmas morning, as my in-laws were walking in the door, I reached into the stove to steal a home fry and realized something peculiar. They were ice cold. Our 18 year old gas range died, on Christmas Day.

Only the day we were supposed to cook a ham dinner and have 6 people over...

Steve and I looked at each other. I think we thought the same thing: "We can let this ruin our holiday, or we can just roll with the punches." We decided on the latter, poured Mimosas and Bloody Marys for us and his family, and continued on with the morning. Steve's parents ended up dropping the ham off at my aunt & uncle's house, which was conveniently on their way home. My aunt and uncle cooked the ham and brought it with them that evening. Everything worked out.

I should have remembered that things come in 3's.

The next day, after reading review after review and looking at deal after deal, I ordered a new gas range online from Lowe's, then headed off on my big after-Christmas shopping day. It was slow-going as it was snowing pretty steadily. Suddenly I get the first flat tire of my life, and had to wait for my father-in-law to come to my rescue (I do not know how to change a flat and need to rectify that). Then I was on my way.

Yesterday (Sunday) I went up to the Council on Aging office to print out the January newsletter. 18 copies in, the copier says it's out of toner. Toner that's locked up in a cabinet that I don't have access to because it belongs to the town. The only thing I could do is pack up my bag and be thankful that, because Steve is on Christmas break, I have the ability to go back today to finish it.

There have been so many little things in the past few days that I could really let bother me if I let them. I'm not going to let them. The gas range dying, the flat tire caused by a nail, the toner being out- these are not things that I could have done anything about.

In fact, it has reminded me of something that I really want to keep in mind for 2014:

Let go of what you can't control.

Wise words, right? In the mean time, I have started to get excited about the thought of my very own brand new stove. It's our first major appliance purchase. I'm hoping it's a good one.

He Made Me Cry

He made my cry. My husband, that is. After 7 years of marriage, that man can still pull it off. He gave me one of the most thoughtful, meaningful Christmas presents I have ever received.

On Christmas Eve, while we waited for Santa, he brought down this large rectangular shape and placed it gingerly by the tree. I knew it was something he had made, and so I probably should have known I was a goner, crying-wise, at that moment. He encouraged me to open it then, without the bustle of kids and Christmas around us, so I might enjoy it more.

I peeled the paper back and, as I've mentioned, began to cry. He had put together a timeline of all of the owners of our house, starting with the man who built it, my great great great grandfather, Hiram Packard, and ending with me. There have been seven Packard owners since the house was built 160 years ago, and Steve included a picture (with the exception of one we can't find), and a bio for each person. Around the edges he included a property tax bill from 1885 for $14 and some change. He added pictures of the house throughout the years, including when route 9 was what is now our current driveway.

It's beautiful, and I couldn't stop looking at it.

Looking at the faces, the similarities. Reading the bios, how every one of the owners served the town in multiple ways (selectmen, town clerk, firefighter, Historical Society, etc).

I was amazed, all over again, that I had married a man who knew me so well. Who knew my passion for my family history, this town and this house. This beautiful, old house that has seen so much love, and it's share of heartache, too. To commemorate that in the way that he did, well, I love him for it.

Thank you, Steve.

This Christmas

I think, in my 30th year, I've finally done it. I've figured out this whole Christmas thing.

I started shopping early- October. I made a list of all the people I wanted to buy for and ideas of what to get them. Long gone are the days when I had time to leisurely stroll through the mall and look for gifts. Now I just try to listen more to what people say they like, where people say they like to shop, and I base my gift giving off of that.

I ordered our Christmas cards right before Thanksgiving, hoping I'd hit a good deal. I did- 40% off at Shutterfly. Note to self- order more next year! I was about ten short.

Lovely craft and Advent ideas floated in front of my eyes on Pinterest, but I decided this wasn't the year to complicate things. We stuck with our chocolate Advent calendar, and no Elves on Shelves or Kindness Elves graced our house this year. We did just a few crafts and at some point I just decided- that was enough. Sure, there are a lot of cool ideas out there, but we don't need to try every last one.

I had all my wrapping paper already- bought last year, the day after Christmas, for 50% off. The way to go, I'm telling you.

The one thing I forgot? Scotch tape. And when the time to wrap finally presented myself, I didn't want to wait. No, this year's wrapping paper is held together with snowflake and motivational stickers we had on hand. I'm thinking the 3 year old and almost 2 year old won't even notice (or care).

Simplify, simplify. It has worked. Even the unintentional act of not going near a mall (thank you, online shopping) in the past few months, has worked wonders on my stress levels. The commercialism hasn't been in my face quite as much, and, hey, maybe that's why I don't mind Christmas music 24/7 this month- I'm not associating it with busy, loud stores filled with stressed out people.

One of my favorite moments this past weekend was after Buddy came in from playing out in the snow with Steve & Rosie. I got him changed into some dry clothes, and then we snuggled on the couch, watched an episode of Chuggington- that boy loves his trains- and shared a candy cane. I'll take that over a day of Christmas shopping at the mall anytime.

Chocolate Pretzel Treats

I would be remiss if I didn't devote an entire post to these delectable treats. After all, they are this family's favorite at Christmas!

I'll never forget the year my sister-in-law placed these cute treats on the table in front of us. One bite, and I never looked back! They are perfect for this time of year.

Chocolate Pretzel Treats

Bag of small pretzel squares (Snyder's calls them Snaps)
Hershey Kisses
Red & Green M&Ms

Preheat oven to 300. Put aluminum foil on a baking sheet, lay out pretzels in a single layer. Place an unwrapped Hershey kiss on each one, pop them in the oven for 3 minutes. Take them out and immediately press a red or green m&m into each one. Let them cool.

Salty & sweet. Heaven, I'm telling you. Warning: these are addictive!

The kids loved helping me make them. I thought they'd have trouble taking the wrappers off the kisses, but nope! They did great. Rosie loved pressing the m&ms in, and Buddy missed the memo and just started eating m&ms by the handful. I mean, he is his mother's son.

Enjoy!

Empower Your Partner

Us mothers, we just try to do too much.

We read the books before baby arrives. We make a baby registry. We hear stories far and wide from other mothers about their deliveries. Then, baby arrives. Maybe, just maybe, we try to control everything surrounding baby- when he or she has the first bath, how it's done, because, you see, we've read the book.

Quickly we might find ourselves in a pattern of doing most everything when it comes to the baby, and when it comes to our partner trying to help, we tell them how to do it. This might be welcomed or resented on their part.

Before you know it, one or the both of you might be saying "Well, you're really better at this" and certain aspects of parenting fall solely on one of you. Before you can blink an eye, your kid is showing a preference for one of you at certain times- bedtime or bath time for instance- and you and your partner might just look at each other, shrug, and go along with it.

Don't do it, mamas.

I thought because our baby didn't see her dad all day, she'd prefer him, Nope, she still wanted me. For everything. It's easy to give in because it will cause less tears and less stress for everyone.

Don't do it.

There was no reason that Dad couldn't give her a bath or put her to bed. I will say that it was Rosie who had the preferences- Buddy didn't and I wonder if it's because we had a different mindset with him from the start. I told Rosie that Dad could do it just as well, and after a few tears, you know what? She was fine and having a great time with her Dad who she hadn't seen all day.

Empower your partner.

There is nothing I do that Steve can't do as well for our kids. Neither one of us is "the only one" who can do bedtime, baths or meals. On the occasion that I'm away- maybe just a dinner out with a friend- I have no worries about Steve being able to handle the kids. He is a terrific father and knows all the ins and outs of our kids as well as I do.

Moms, I plead with you- don't try to do it all. Is it nice to be wanted by your children? Yes, of course. But they need to see that you have confidence in their father to do things just as well as you do. Teach them gender equality from the beginning. So what if your husband doesn't do everything the way you do? It's good for your children to experience different parenting styles. It's good to let go and not try to control every situation. If you need things a very certain way, know that your children may see that and insist upon the same.

Moms, go a little easier on yourselves. You don't have to do it all. None of us can. Empower your partner to join you on this journey called Parenthood.

Little Reminders

Every day I pick up around the house. Twice a day, as a matter of fact. First time is after I've put the kids down for naps, the second time is after they've gone to bed. Some might say I'm crazy (for picking up twice), I say it helps keep me fit. It's all about movement, baby! For me, a cleaner and more organized house has symbolized something even more important- my health. I'm not sitting very much!

I digress.

Picking up the house, as good as it is for my body, is still not the most exciting chore in the world. Something that makes it a little more fun, however, are the glimpses I see into my children's imaginations.

A window sill had become a train track for Buddy's two small train cars. Remote controls had become beds for Rosie's little people. The spot under the table had become a fort. The end table had become a highway for matchbox cars.

Everywhere I look, I see Little Reminders of my little children. They're still little, but not for long. How many more years will I find princesses in my boots and stickers on my slippers?

Even on the hardest days, these reminders make me smile. It makes me remember that imagination is a gift, one that adults should try to use more often.

Friday Five: Easy Weeknight Dinners

Here are a few of our favorite dinners:

1. Roasted Drumsticks & Veggies. The best thing about this is that you cook everything at once- the chicken and the vegetables. So tasty! I had to cook them longer than the recipe suggested (I did close to an hour). This meal is in regular rotation at our house this time of year.

2. Oven Baked Chicken Fajitas. Simply put, you need to make these. They're the best homemade fajitas ever! I can't believe you can create the seasoning so easily at home; I shake my head thinking of all the years I bought the little packets of El Paso Fajita Seasoning. The only thing I do differently from the recipe is that I sprinkle some Mexican cheese on the top 5 minutes before it's done baking. And sour cream is a must once you put it in the tortilla!

3. Taco Mac Casserole. Another ridiculously easy and scrumptious meal. I might be 30 years old, but I've got nothing against Kraft Mac & Cheese, which is what this recipe calls for. I never knew it could taste quite this good.

4. Creamy Tomato Tortellini Soup. This soup is so good with a loaf of warm, fresh bread on a cold evening. Tortellini is one of those things that I love, but I also used to forgot it exists. That doesn't happen anymore now that I make this!

5. Buffalo Chicken & Potatoes Casserole. Notice the title of this post isn't healthy weeknight dinners, because this recipe is not exactly light. It is, however, amazing, and I believe in everything in moderation! My alterations: cream of chicken instead of cream of celery, Ken's blue cheese dressing, panko instead of cornflake crumbs, omitted the green onion. Upped the cooking time by about 20 minutes. Really good.

What's one of your go-to weeknight dinners?

For the Love of Hunting

I just bid the guys adieu. They're off to their yearly hunting weekend, and maybe this will be the year they get a deer.

I have no problem with hunting. I grew up in these rural Hilltowns, therefore I grew up with hunting. And guns. It is a culture here, and when Steve first told me he was into hunting I wasn't surprised in the least. I needed to look no further than our attic to see a picture of my great grandfather, Paul, standing proudly with his gun and a deer circa 1925. Hunting, while no longer a means of survival, is still practiced here.

I'm lucky, though. One of the guys that hunts with Steve? His wife happens to be one of my very best friends. She's coming up to our house with their kids, and they'll spend the weekend like they did last year. Our four kids are ridiculously close in age- her oldest is a mere 2 years and 1.5 months older than my youngest, and our two girls' ages are in between! They'll run around, tear the house apart, and I can see us sitting back (maybe adult beverages in hand), and marveling at what a change a year brings.

And I'm hoping for that deer. The frugal part of me could really see a benefit to the meat a deer would provide. I've had venison plenty of times, and if cooked correctly, it's pretty tasty.

As I waved goodbye to the guys tonight, I remembered one of the things Steve said to me when we first started dating. He said he loved that I was a Goshen Girl- someone not afraid to walk in the woods (ahem, not during hunting season), go to Vermont, use an outhouse, etc. He was glad that I was okay with his interest in hunting.

Almost 12 years later, I'm still proud to be his Goshen Girl.

(ETA: I wrote this last Thursday. The guys, sadly, did not get a deer, but my friend and I had a fun time and the kids played together well).

Loss

The thing about Facebook is that you may be friends with a lot of people, but some of them, if they don't ever post, you kind of forget they're there. That is, until their birthday reminder pops up on the right of your screen. A few weeks ago, I saw that it was Denise's birthday, a woman both Steve and I worked with when we were on the maintenance crew at MCLA. I wrote her a birthday wish, thought to myself what a good person she was, and off I went with my day.

That evening, my sister was ready to babysit the kids, and I was getting ready to go out on our monthly date night. I called out to Steve and he didn't answer. I found him in front of his iPad, mouth open in shock. "Denise died" was all he could mutter. My heart sank to my stomach as we both looked at her Facebook page in disbelief. People had written things like "Miss you every day, Denise", "Thinking of you on your special day. Miss you lots".

It finally sunk in. Denise had passed. Months ago- in June. And we learned through Facebook, of all things.

It's not that we were close but we had kept in touch all these years through Christmas cards and the occasional email. We knew she had a bout with cancer, but last we knew she was doing better. We live 45 minutes away from her in a different county, so we didn't see her obituary. We didn't know her husband or family, so they had no reason to call us. It was a very strange way to find out bad news.

I've really been trying to pay attention to my gut lately (because I now think that's God speaking), and my gut told me to write a letter to Denise's family. It didn't matter that I had never met them, I needed to write them.

I finally wrote that letter last week. In it I conveyed our connection to her and what we remembered her being (a hard worker, always smiling, hearty laugh and just a good, good person). I also made it a point to mention to them that she always talked and bragged about her family: even though we were only in touch occasionally, it was evident her family meant the world to her. I needed to let them know that she loved them deeply (I'm sure they already know, but it never hurts to hear it again) and that her Faith was strong. In particular, her last letter gave so much praise to God. I had thought about it often over the past year.

I'm sure that they might be a little taken aback by this letter, as it's so many months after the fact, but I also hope it might help their healing process. I know that I never tire of hearing people's stories of my mom. My prayers are with them this month, as I know how hard the holidays are after losing someone.

We lost some good people this year.

My 100th Post

This is my 100th post on this blog, which is thoroughly mind-boggling. I worried that I would run out of things to write about, long ago. Maybe that won't happen!

When I think of my blog, Lines from Lithia, I think of Emily Dickinson's poem, "This is My Letter to the World." This blog is My Letter to the World. It's my letter to my husband, my children, my family, my friends. This is my letter to you.

I wear my heart on my sleeve; I always have. I probably overshare. I don't have anything to hide and I don't feel a need anymore to pretend to be someone I'm not. I'm an introvert who likes people. I'm a book worm who would rather do the dishes and hang the laundry on the drying racks to the tune of the birds chirping at the feeder than to the repetitive tunes on the radio. I'm a serious girl who likes a good laugh. I'm a feminist who never once envisioned being a stay at home mom, but now would never trade it for the world. I'm a believer in God but wish I prayed more often. I'm a believer in chocolate every day and getting up before the kids do so I can start my day sane.

I'm a believer in the escapism that books offer, and the freedom that writing provides.

I believe in writing about the good stuff and the bad, because if I can reassure just one person out there that they are not alone, I've done something worthwhile. I believe in writing for me, even though it can be easy to succumb to what I think my readers might like most to read.

I believe in me. If you told me two years ago that I would lose over 60 lbs and be 100 posts into a blog, I might have laughed at you. Now I believe that any of us, cliché as it sounds, can do anything we want to.

I believe in you. Thank you for reading!

Living Up Here

A friend's recent Facebook post about her annoyance over her neighbor's dog who barked for an hour made me pause. I had forgotten, or simply taken for granted, one of the best things about living in this rural area: No obnoxious neighbors!

The only sounds are the constant hum of route 9 and nature. That's it. No dogs howling (unless they're ours), no noisy next door neighbors, no one.

One of my friends, the first time she visited our house said: "You're so isolated up here!".

I had never thought that. Do I see people from my doorstep? Rarely. But in this digital age I have friends literally at my fingertips- texting, email, Facebook. It might look lonely here but it isn't.

I revel in the quiet, the peacefulness, and being able to look up at a star-lit sky not obscured by street lights.

It's 7 minutes to the closest gas station and ATM, and 20 minutes to the nearest grocery store. Sometimes it seems like a major inconvenience, especially if you just need one thing, but in general, we don't mind the drive. Our kids have always liked riding in the car, and I enjoy being able to listen to music and podcasts.

You can't put a price tag on peace and quiet.

New Traditions

As Thanksgiving came upon us, I realized we had plans for the meal- to meet Steve's family at a restaurant for 12:30, then back to their house for pie and cards- but no plans for Thanksgiving morning.

Thanksgiving morning...not something especially known for traditions up until now. I decided I wanted to change that because it has always seemed disappointing to me, even as an adult, when holiday mornings seem like the same as any morning.

Plans began to form.

I ran the idea of a "special breakfast" past Steve, who is the breakfast cook in our house. He immediately narrowed down a few recipes we had never had, and decided on a Sausage, Egg, Hash brown Casserole. I came up with the idea for us to enjoy a few mimosas, as well, and because it was a holiday, I bought the apple cider donuts I had been eyeing for months.

The morning couldn't have gone better! We all stayed in our pajamas, the house was toasty warm from the wood stove, and to top it off, there were lazy snowflakes floating through the air outside. It couldn't have been more picturesque.

We watched the parade on TV as we ate our breakfast (yet another special thing that we never usually do), and just relaxed. Eventually we took showers and baths, and headed off to our Thanksgiving dinner. It was very different from the usual hustle and bustle a typical morning brings.

We couldn't remember a nicer Thanksgiving morning. It was special in many ways, and also a reminder that, if you put your mind to it, any moment can be as fun as you want to make it. A lot of it depends purely on your mindset.